BEWARE THE MOON REVIEWS
Before watching Mayhem, it really did give me a Belko Experiment feel. People stuck in an office block, getting very violent, but turns out, that's about how far the similarities stop. "A virus spreads through an office complex causing white collar workers to act out their worst impulses."
Mayhem is a very easy and fun film to watch, it's simple to watch and simple to follow - and honestly, sometimes that is all you want. Mayhem is a film that follows pretty much all the office cliches. Nasty bosses, who get nastier the higher up the floors you go, with the big big BIG boss being on the top floor, and the less important closer to the floor. The two heroes are out spoken, and kicking ass, while also getting into trouble as they go - well, when they were working that is. The others in between are just the same old bullies mainly, but maybe that could just be the virus...
The virus, was something I loved, it didn't just make people angry or violent, oh no, it made you feel whatever your worst and deepest impulse was. Cue people shagging on desks and stealing mugs, amongst other things.
I feel every time I mention enjoying gore and violence in films, I immediately go up in everyone's psycho books - but honestly, I just love some fake gore! Fake! I make a point of saying fake! And Mayhem has plenty, plenty of office style violence, just imagine all the fun that can be had with staplers and mice and keyboards!? The ideas are endless! And that is what happens here, every weapon is pretty much out of the office which makes for some very fun deaths, and some that I very much enjoyed.
Overall, I liked Mayhem. It's a very little movie, with very fun gore and office humor. Makes a Monday to Friday job a little bit more fun...
I actually did not mind the remake of I Spit on Your Grave, they got a bit meh, as they went on, but the first one wasn't too shabby. This remake though, is the original, and is, in my eyes, is all pretty meh. "After a young writer (Camille Keaton) is brutally raped and left for dead by four men, she systematically hunts them down one by one to exact a terrible vengeance."
This film has been on my wishlist for a while, it is a classic and video nasty after all, and I finally found it on a boxset I bought called Box of the Banned. Basically a DVD boxset of banned films - great, huh? Anyway, it was the first disc in the book, so I went for it - I did not like it.
I had heard it was disturbing, and that it wasn't nice, and obviously it being a video nasty, and I get that. There are numerous rape scenes, and rape is never a good thing, and they are nasty to watch - no lie there. But, those aren't why I didn't like this film. I just didn't enjoy it, I couldn't get into it, I wasn't a fan of the camera angles - camera angles can make or break a film in my eyes - the acting was okay, but I didn't like how slow a burn this film was. It was a very slow builder of a film, with a slow burn, but it didn't really go anywhere, it had some big scenes, such as the rape scenes which is why this film is pretty much known, but even the death scenes weren't that great.
In my opinion, the remake is better. The original just felt like it was on one level, one mellow level that just didn't blow me away. It's a classic, and a video nasty, but that didn't mean I'd like it. Good concept, and great empowering female character, but did not do it for me.
Something you might not know about me - because if you did, it could mean that you were a bit of a stalker - but I used to be a huge Disney and Nickelodeon fan - might still be... This had not one Disney actor in it, but also a Nickelodeon actor too - I hit the jackpot. "The true, haunting story of young Jeffrey Dahmer -- the shy adolescent in high school who becomes a notorious serial killer years later."
Ross Lynch, famously from Disney channel and off a film I love, Teen Beach Movie, (Yes, I did admit that), plays Dahmer himself, and honestly, he looks identical to Dahmer at that age, it's actually scary. The film is based on a book of the same name, written, fun fact right here, by John 'Derf' Backderf who was actually one of Dahmer school friends - meaning it should be fairly close to the truth. Should be. (In My Friend Dahmer, Derf is played by Alex Wolff, who is a well known Nickelodeon actor, and is also known as the son in Hereditary - he has an easier time in this film, that's for sure...). It's also shot in Dahmer's actual childhood house, if that isn't a little bit creepy but also a little bit impressive with how much work went into this film.
A lot of work did go into this film, and it pays off, it is very close to the truth, a lot went in to getting the actors like the real people they were playing, and it does stick to the book, and nothing is added to 'make it more glamorous' or so. My Friend Dahmer sticks to what it knows, and sticks to getting the audience the correct facts. It doesn't try and sell you more than it can, none of it is a lie. It sticks to the truth and really does not give a toss if you wanted murder and blood and guts - YOU WON'T GET IT.
My Friend Dahmer covers Dahmer's younger years, no killing is done in this, there is no gore, or blood. I have to be honest, I didn't know that, I did kind of go in expecting to see a murder or two, but I wasn't that disappointed when I didn't get any. My Friend Dahmer shows you who he was, and does that well. Honestly, you don't come out of this liking him that much...
Overall, I enjoyed this film, it gave a whole new light to serial killer movies, and gave you a whole new feel to them, one without the deaths and killing. I wouldn't say it would go in my top ten, but I still enjoyed it, and it made me want to read up on everything to do with it, so that's good. I did love the ending though. I don't want to spoil it, but I will hint, Stephen Hicks is all I am going to say.
Disclaimer: this is not set on a rock in Brighton. It is in fact, set on a mountain trail in America - can't go buying any rock here or have a paddle in the sea. "A park ranger spends the night guarding a potential crime scene on a remote mountain trail."
I found I had a like/hate relationship with this film. I didn't love it, but I didn't hate it, so let's say, a like/dislike relationship with it. I feel it started kind of well, the characters weren't awful, the build up isn't dreadfully dull, but then it just kind of slows down a bit. Wendy goes off, and gets lost. And not just a little bit lost, she wanders off onto a whole different hill side that is not covered by where she works - now, I know America is big, but she must have been walking for hours. And she was only doing some form of leafleting.
Poor Wendy, stuck somewhere she has no idea where she is, and damn, she forgot to charge her phone, and it's now almost dead. Dammit, Wendy!
Wendy's phone is almost dead, but before that dies, someone else has died before - Wendy comes across a dead body. Oh no, can Wendy's day get even worse?! Well yes, it can, she is told no one will get to her until morning - and again, the film slows down again. It picked up as she saw the dead body and the tension piled up around that, she also may have seen a mysterious person down with the dead body too - so hello tension, but then it drops.
I had a lot of questions about this film, just mainly common sense really. Found myself asking why Wendy isn't using a walkie talkie to contact the office, or why she doesn't have one on her - turns out she does but for some reason she doesn't use it until her phone dies. Something I didn't understand. Just little common sense things like that stood out to me.
I almost also forgot to mention, I watched this with my friend on a Friday afternoon, and he fell asleep. He was wrapped up in my slanket - my blanket with arms - but still, he fully nodded off.
Overall, Body at Brighton Rock was an alright film, it had it's good parts and tension, but it didn't seem to lead off those, which I feel it should have. It had a good twist, one that did play out well, but I just didn't feel it took advantage of what story it had going.
Most actors can be very easily type cast, and some can stick to the same sort of roles, but not Seann William Scott - oh no. Don't call him Stifler in this, because he might just kill you... "Haunted by dark memories of childhood abuse, Evan, a social worker and first-time dad, struggles to keep his need for revenge in check."
I went into Bloodline blind, had never heard of it, never seen a trailer, nothing. But hey, I needed a film to watch at the gym and I liked the sound of it. Did I regret my decision? Not at all! Actually, Bloodline is actually a super fun film.
I didn't hate it at all, really, I was super into it. Especially as it was super bloody... And bloody out of nowhere too. Without giving too much away, one of the first murders is a a stab to the neck, that is then pulled out violently, literally breaking the skin and slitting the neck completely. Honestly, it's great. Out of nowhere and great.
I do have a complaint though, it's very dark and that is not ideal for gym lighting... Just for the records...
I thought Bloodline was done really well actually, I liked how they used flashbacks, not too much, and just enough so you hadn't forgotten who people were - that can happen a lot. I also really liked the twists, again, all very understandable, and not just one, a few. Not one after the other either, spread out, and one especially was like a slap to the face. If there wasn't a horrible virus going round, my jaw may have hit the floor...
Overall, Bloodline was a good film, I liked the gore, I liked the actual story of it, it was a bit dark and indie feeling on occasion, but it definitely did not take away from how much I liked this. Wouldn't pop it in my top list of horrors, but I would recommend it if asked.
Oh, and Stifler definitely does not make an appearance in this, it is most definitely some great acting from Seann William Scott who does portray a secretly manic, serial killer, ("kind of like Dexter" is thrown around with this film a lot), really well and he does definitely pull it off.
You want to watch a weird film, a super gory film, and one that could make you feel a little bit dirty? Girl on the Third Floor might just be for you! "A man tries to renovate a dilapidated house for his growing family, only to learn that the house has other plans."
Oh boy, where do I start? Well, I saw the trailer for this months ago, probably back in 2019, and I wanted to lay my eyeballs on it straight away - sadly, it was never mentioned again over here in the UK, unless I missed it... It was never mentioned again, UNTIL NOW, when Netflix has kindly added it. And what day did I decide to watch it on? A Sunday, with the parents sitting either side of me - I know what you are thinking: Aren't they lucky parents, because that is such a Sunday movie, and such a nice film to watch. Well yes, yes they are, and here's why...
Girl on the Third Floor is a weird film, so bizarre, a film that will make you say "whaaaaaat?" a lot, and one that never really reveals anything until the ending. And you know what, I dug it! I honestly was into this the whole time. Did I have any idea what was going on? Nope! Did I care? Not really. I had all the gore I wanted and, not to be too crude, but the house was oozing something that looked like semen, and blood - talk about a body horror. And not even a body horror, a house body horror - now that's new.
Honestly, I can say I have never seen a house drip semen before, and I don't think I knew how to react to that, what I knew how to react to though, was how Don, the main guy, was touching it all with no gloves or anything on. Not only that, he was renovating the whole house with no gloves, no mask, no nothing - was he mad?! The house ejaculated on him, and he didn't even feel the need to watch protection?! Have save sex, kids!
I really did dig this film, the whole film, no idea what was going on, and I liked that. You have to stick with the film right up until the end to know who the mysterious Sarah was, why the house keeps getting excited and all that other shit that comes with it - no shit is in this film though, as a warning. That is not a bodily fluid the house lets out...
I did think I had the end down to a T and I liked the ending, but then I wanted more on the film and so Googled it... and damn, people have a lot of different ideas on it. Ideas that I can't say due to spoilers, but let's just say, I fell down that rabbit hole and now what I thought, might not be what the director thought...
Anyway, this film is mental, so mental, but I liked it. It satisfied me gore wise, and body horror wise, and honestly, some days you just need to watch a film that makes you feel a bit dirty and see a house get a bit turned on, rightttttt?
Just call me a sick bugger, maybe.
Oh, and remember, the dog is just an actor...
Now, this was a surprise. Went out for a meal, got back late, put this on not expecting to watch it all, and to pass the time, but hours later, still watching it, and I loved it. "Nine high school students celebrate graduation at a secluded home in the wilderness. Once the party dies down they play a game: Dead Body. But when one of them actually murders someone, it's up to the group to ferret out the real murderer."
Dead Body is a fairly unknown film from what I could find, I had never heard of it, and it seemed to be hidden away on Prime. It starts out like a normal easy film, one that kind of reminded me of a lower budget version of The Cabin in the Woods, and then it gets going. People start dying and you really start to try and work it out for yourself. I was pulled in with this one due to the story, I love a good game and cat and mouse and all that - get my brain working, let me feel like I am Sara Sidle in CSI!
From the start, you know the story, and you know what's going to happen, you know someone is going to die and someone is going to kill, but who that is, is the thing. I feel the best thing with this film is it keeps you interested and it keeps you caring about who the killer is.
Dead Body is also really clever, it likes to keep you interested as mentioned before, but also likes to spin you around lots and lots. One twist comes along, and you think you know what is going on, and the next minute, you learn you're miles off from what the twist actually is. Or is it... Who knows!
Overall, Dead Body is a great film. I love one that keeps me guessing and one that pushes me in one way only for it to be the wrong way, and one that is fun. This film is a fun one too, and is very entertaining as a whole. Honestly, if you have time, give this one a go.
Dead Shack needs a new tagline. Dead Shack: Does what it says on the tin. "While staying at a cabin in the woods during the weekend, three teenage kids discover their neighbor is 'feeding' guests to her zombie family. In short order, the battle is on as the kids fight to save themselves and their family."
Dead Shack is a simple little thing. It's a zombie film that, as mentioned before, does exactly what it says on the tin. No twists, no secrets, just a fun little zombie film. Reminded me a bit of Home Alone with the kids having to try and save everyone, mixed with a little bit of Betty White out of Lake Placid, feeding the crocodile, but here, feeding zombies instead.
Dead Shack is a great little film if you want simple, simple and fun. Oh, and zombies, and some blood. If you want an easy to watch film, this could be up your street. Simple. I liked it. It's fun, and it's cute with everyone using household items for weapons and also drunk people...
A short and simple little review for a short and simple little film. Doesn't mean it's bad, so if you fancy it, go for it.
Due to Parasite breaking history and being the first non English speaking film to win best picture at the Oscars, as well as three others, I thought I would go down the same route, do a South Korean film review and make you realise you are missing out if you aren't watching foreign films... Today, I am talking about The Wailing: "Soon after a stranger arrives in a little village, a mysterious sickness starts spreading. A policeman, drawn into the incident, is forced to solve the mystery in order to save his daughter."
The Wailing is one of those films that popped up everywhere, and was highly recommended, especially if you wanted something truly creepy and to get under your skin. I never turn down a film that will try and creep me out or get under my skin - so I was in.
Sadly, The Wailing did not creep me out or get under my skin, BUT, it is a genuinely good film. Such a well made and well thought out film. The effects as well, are outstanding, it's a dirty feeling film, one that really makes you want to go and wash your hands, and then also call in a priest...
I also liked that there was a little twist in it, as we all do know that I love a good twist... I did not see it coming and it really does not allow you to see it coming either until the last minute, which I think is the best way to do it. Leading you down another rabbit hole, but allowing you to know the characters so they could be one of your suspects.
It's a dark, and dirty movie, and even though I didn't get what I was expecting, I still enjoyed it. The Wailing is just as great a film as I had originally heard. And after saying that, onto my TED talk on foreign films:
Foreign films/non-English speaking films are some of the most underrated films in the entertainment industry. I love them. They have a different feel about them, less about wanting to please everyone like some big budget films Hollywood films, and more about sticking to their roots and wanting to do what they want. I have no problem with reading subtitles, never have and since I started watching them, I felt like a pro reading them. Can read them quicker than the person speaking can say them - it's a party trick of mine if I do blow my own trumpet.
I feel that stops some people, and I am here to say, don't let that stop you! You'll get used to it, honestly! You're missing out on so many beautiful films and TV shows! Need some inspiration?!
My list of must watches:
- The Host
- The Devil's Backbone
- Blue is the Warmest Colour
- Pan's Labyrinth
- One Cut of the Dead
- Funny Games
- Train to Busan
So please, there is my list of a few to watch, and there aren't all horrors if you want to mix it up a bit...now go! Go and watch a subtitled film, don't miss out on all the beauty!!
I finally did it! I finally got Shudder, and already, I know I am keeping it past the free period they give you. I am down to the second to last episode of Creepshow and I only started it yesterday... But that is waiting for Youtube!
Going back to Shudder - first film I watched on it? One Cut of the Dead. And did I like it? I loved it!
One Cut of the Dead is a breath of fresh air for any horror film, it mainly does zombies, but really, it needs a whole new category for itself. I can't say too much about it, as it really does help to go in blind and not know what you're in for, in my mind anyway as that is what I did. You can watch the trailer though, as it really does not give anything away, just makes you even more intrigued/confused, confused is a big one here...
The film starts with you watching a horror film, a zombie movie to say the least. Goes straight into it, no intro or anything, and it's really not the best. I was watching this with my dad and I feel like both of us at one time or anything, considered that this was not that good a film, and to fine something else. Neither said anything though, and both knew that the reviews were really good, so we stuck with it, and thank God we did!
The opening zombie film is not good, and is awkward and just all over the place, and honestly, you're lost. Reading reviews, and seeing it has 100% on Rotten Tomatoes, you're lost and thinking you've put on the wrong film. But stick with it, as it really is one of the smartest films I have ever seen. Don't give up with it. It's one of the most original films out there, and you may feel put off by the start, but don't change it - stick with it and you'll be pleasantly surprised.
I have such praise for this film! Such praise, I highly recommend it to anyone, even if you're not a zombie fan, do it. You'll be sorry if you don't, and I feel this is one of the shortest reviews ever, but I do not want to ruin it for anyone!!
Oh, and I am keeping Shudder forever.
Watching horror films since like 2003, when I could stand dead bodies..