BEWARE THE MOON REVIEWS
I hadn't really heard much about this film before watching this, I had seen it was on Netflix and knew of the film but that was it. so picture the scene, I have a first date/hang out with someone, meant to be going to the pub but because of bad weather, (live in England), we decide to stay in. we decide to head onto Netflix and he chooses this one, I chose for us to watch a horror film, obviously, and he chose the film, this one, because he loved it. "Three Scouts must summon the courage to survive when their town becomes the scene of a zombie outbreak in this Paramount Pictures horror comedy from director Christopher Landon."
I have to be honest, I wasn't fully into it to start with, it felt to me like it was trying to be another Tucker and Dale VS Evil, just with less of a storyline. I say less of a storyline as when the film actually started, it felt like it didn't have much of one. It did pick up though, I do give it that, by the end of it I really did enjoy it, and there were even parts of it that while watching it I was thinking my parents would enjoy it. That might not mean much to you, but when I think that, that normally means it's a good film.
I liked the film as a whole, and it really did have some funny moments. Not just funny, but some funny and cringey moments. Mainly to do with genitals, and moments I could go on and say about, but I do want to keep this review PG and also, I am not sure how to say any of it in the nicest way possible... Lets just say, if you have seen the film, you should know which moments I mean, one involves female genitalia and one involves meat and two veg...
Scouts Guide, I have shortened it down as it is so damn long to write, is also quite original in its story and characters. I don't think I can think of any films that are around Scouts or any kiddie organisations like that, and then also bringing in an element such as the undead. The heroes in the film are also teenagers too, so there is that aspect, unlikely heroes - just like the old people and the cockneys in Cockneys VS Zombies. Zombies seem to like to pick a fight against the unoriginal heroes, don't they?!
The gore and the action was great too, not too much, but it was enough. The action especially kept you interested and it wasn't serious, each part of action tended to have a funny element to it, so if someone was blown up, something would make you laugh about it - twisted, huh.
I thought I would like this film, and I did, it's a comedy horror film that is mainly horror and the zombies run... I love running zombies. AND ZOMBIE ANIMALS - just saying.
I would definitely recommend this, I shall for sure be recommending it to at least my parents - and as I said, that's a great thing in a movie. I also hate kids, and I didn't hate any of the characters in this... Bravo!
OH! And the Britney Spears zombie part is literally genius... One of the best things I have ever seen.
So, this popped up on netflix and I love a good shark film, as well as my mum loving them too, so we all sat down on Sunday and had a watch. "Three friends from California head to the rugged Australian coast for a cage-dive encounter with great white sharks. When a massive wave suddenly destroys their boat, they find themselves floating in the ocean with a swarm of hungry man-eaters."
What I hadn't realised about the film though, was it was the newest sequel to the 2003 film Open Water... As soon as I saw that, I really didn't think I would like it, I didn't like the other two Open Waters that much... Quite slow and nothing really happened I found. And being this is the second sequel, I didn't really think that I was in for much. But was I wrong! Far from wrong actually.
I thought this was so much better than the first two, even though at first the characters really did my head in, I did grow to like them a fair bit.
The main characters are three friends, two brothers and one brothers girlfriend, obviously this doesn't go to plan... I won't tell you in which ways as it is fun to watch, but if you think about it, you can probably guess... It's still very fun to watch though, especially as tensions start to rise in the group later on.
I think what this film did that made it more enjoyable than the others was that I felt it had more of an ongoing story. It took a while for them to get capsized and stuck at sea, and up until that point you were watching them be friends, travel around, all sorts, it wasn't just watching people float in an ocean which the other two pretty much is. This film has a story and you get to know the friends and see what happens with them and travel with them, then, even when they get stuck floating, it changes it up ever so often too. It is not just a story about people floating.
On a side note though, sharks aren't this mean, they actually get a bad rep from films like this, (don't believe everything you see in films, people!), and don't actually like the taste of humans. They bite to see what we are, if they had hands, they would use those to see what we were, but all they have are teeth and a mouth. Don't hate them.
Another side note, one of my longest, closest friends has a fear of sharks but reads my website, so unlike last time, I won't put any photos of sharks on here for her... Just if you were wondering why there were no photos of a film about sharks..
Without trying to be mean, I was not expecting a lot from this film, it was on the Horror Channel , late at night and the cast weren't exactly the biggest cast. I knew some of the cast saying that, the dad from Wrong Turn, the son from Jurassic World and, after googling for a while, realised the mum was from Shaun of The Dead. "Returning from vacation, the Miller family find their home has been broken into. After cleaning up the mess they continue with their lives, shaking off the feeling of being violated. But little do they know the nightmare has just begun."
Now, before I say anything, this film is pretty much a serial killer version of Paranormal Activity. What do I mean by that I hear you say? Well, someone breaks into the family home and leaves cameras everywhere - everywhere. Like there are so many cameras around the place I found my asking out loud, "how are they not seeing those cameras?!". The cameras were even moving and zooming in, so some part of them in the corners of the room or whereas they are hiding, must have been moving - not one character saw them.
The person who was in the house was even filming them at one point, and going in and filming them sleeping - which is super creepy, but also something that you feel would have left clues. Well, maybe not just that but even all the cameras around the house, First Dates uses cameras like them and you can see them, yet, no one in this saw anything...
Because of all the cameras, the whole film is filmed on secret cameras, some, as said before, on walls and some handheld. It literally is like Paranormal Activity but without the Paranormal part, so kind of just Activity...
It is also a very very slow burner of a film, nothing really happens up until about the last twenty or so minutes. The whole film is pretty much someone watching but not really doing anything but watching and having a little PG fun as he watches the couple have sex.
It's only right at the end things pick up and actually start to get going, then there is a little cliffhanger twist and it ends. It's done. The ending isn't really original, it's sad, and kind of creepy but nothing you haven't seen before. Not awful but not new.
Hangman did not make me want to go off and play Hangman, I did watch it all, I can't say I will watch it again soon, but I don't feel I wasted an hour and a half, so it was okay. Only okay really.. Sorryyyyyyy.
Next time I will watch of the other movies the cast had been in before instead...
I was so keen, for some reason, to watch this film I recorded it twice by an accident... It was not worth the two records that's for sure. "Two schoolboy delinquents learn a lesson that they will never forget when a teacher at the end of his tether decides to abduct them."
First of all, what happens in this film isn't right, but the schoolkids in this are annoying little runts, who really really do get on your nerves and you do wish something happens to them, but not this far. Mr Gale is one angry man, the kids in his class have driven him mad and he wants to get his own back - so why not kidnap some of his students and torture them?! What a brilliant idea! For a teacher, he should have been smarter and maybe chosen Yoga instead... Guess that wouldn't make an okay horror film though...
The Lesson is a very low budget English film, the English part is great, I think us Brits do great horror films, but the low budget part is the part that I was worried about. Now, I am not saying that I don't like low budget horror films, I don't judge a film on how it is made or anything, but I do hate some low budget camera angles and some of the cameras used... I know it sounds petty and bad, but some films I have seen how these awful close up angles that just ruin the film for me. I am all about if you want to make a film, make it however you can, but I just don't like some of it. This film has some of those said camera angles. Just close up face angles and ones that seem to mean to look as if it's you looking and being nosey, but it just looks messy, in my opinion.
I feel I should give The Lesson some credit though and come away from camera angles and cameras, and back onto the actual film. I did watch all of the film, and up until probably just after half way, I was into it. It was pretty bloody and the teacher played a very effective mad teacher, but it got messy, and not messy in a blood everywhere type of messy. In a 'storyline and just the whole film goes downhill' type of way. The ending is just all over the place, the effects get bad, the acting goes downhill and the ending just feels like it was thought up super quickly and with no thought. It is just that cliché ending, bad but also misunderstood character gets together with the good girl and all of a sudden stand up to the bully.
The Lesson is an alright film, as I said, it kind of loses it but some might like the ending...
I DID IT. I FINALLY SAW JIGSAW. I have been so so excited for this film since I heard it was being made and I just couldn't wait... Although, yes, it has taken me a good fews months to actually see it, granted. The point is though, I SAW IT. "Bodies are turning up around the city, each having met a uniquely gruesome demise. As the investigation proceeds, evidence points to one suspect: John Kramer, the man known as Jigsaw, who has been dead for ten years."
I was more excited about seeing this than nervous, because I know a lot of people were a bit like "oooooh, should they be touching this again", kind of like how people get with remakes. I was not nervous one bit, I love each and every SAW, (yes, EVERY SINGLE ONE.), so I was just thrilled that they were making another one.
And I can safely say Jigsaw does not disappoint in anyway shape or form. From the get go it is fast paced, it starts wiith a police chase and then leads into the normal SAW way of showing the newest 'victims' in their ready made traps, all just waking up. As all the SAWS go, it swaps between the victims in the traps, back to the people trying to work it all out; it's just like the first one all over again - happy times!
A good thing Jigsaw did, and did well at that, was nod back to the other films. This was done in different ways, in your face ways and also really subtle little ways too. The in your face ways were things such as the music, and some of the set up of the scenes, such as when it went to the victims and then switched back to the police just like in the good old days.
The little parts are just for us massive fans of it, y'know the ones who have seen every single SAW movie and actually loved them all - that is no lie, I love each and every one, some I love more than others but still love them all. Yes, I am telling the truth...
The little nods are good, less obvious, going from the traps, in some scenes old traps are seen and some even look like old traps. Some scenes are set up to look like scenes out of the old films, mainly the last shot, the last shot made my heart burst... I don't want to say why or what happens, but it literally made my heart burst, it was just such a nice nod back to the first film. Mum and dad didn't get that scene so much, but I'm a SAW buff...
Jigsaw, in my eyes, is a masterpiece, it really made me so so happy. Know what made me even happier? The twists at the end! So many twists and so many you didn't see coming either, some were easy too and some you really really had to think about - but it's all so damn good!
I loved Jigsaw, like loved it so so much. It really didn't let me down being how long I had waited to see this for, and I was sad when it was all over. I want to watch it all again. Actually, not just Jigsaw, them all, I want to have a SAW marathon... Yes... Getting the snacks in and booking time off for it now...
I had never ever heard of this film, there was no reminded in my emails about it saying I might like it, no trailers for it, nothing; this one literally popped out of the blue. Heartthrob though, is not the most original film, I would be the first to admit that, it's pretty much a semi tame take off of Fatal Attraction, and then almost a very much identical copy of the okay film You Get Me.
Heartthrob is about two teens, Dustin and Sam, who start dating, it starts off well, before Dustin starts seeing red and gets to the Glenn Close stalker red in Fatal Attraction...
Heartthrob did nearly got turned off at one point, I have to be honest, I just was not into it at the beginning, I had it on as a background sound, but even when it was only on in the background, I was not interested. Luckily, I don't tend to give up on films that easily, so I kept going and going and actually, it did get better. It is not a masterpiece in anyway, but it's entertaining, and at one point I was more distracted by the film than what I was actually meant to be doing.
Dustin gets annoying, and when I mean annoying, I mean he starts getting super controlling and just mean. I hate super controlling so he proper got under my skin, taking it out on anyone Sam liked or who he saw as someone who could take her away. Found myself telling the sod to chill out the whole time.
And the way he spoke to his mother!? How could he?! I would not dare speak to my parents like how he speaks to his mum. Not only because I would get a massive telling off, but because I am also a nice person... Dustin does not seem like a very nice person by the middle of the film. He starts off as pretty nice at the beginning and then it just takes a huge nosedive... Like huge, huge and including murders...
Heartthrob was better than I had expected to be fair. I like these whole jealousy type movies, like Fatal Attraction and Obsession, but when they try and make it teen friendly, like this and I Got You, that's when I start losing it. But Heartthrob kept me entertained. It's no masterpiece, but it'll pass the time. Will almost put you off dating though...
There are not a lot of photos on this film... SORRY.
Like some of my films, (well, most actually, I'm a massive bargain hunter..), I got this for a few quid, already a bargain. I almost jumped from excitement when it was a cheap Blu Ray too... (I get excited over little things...don't judge me.). "In Chile, a group of travelers who are in an underground nightclub when a massive earthquake hits quickly learn that reaching the surface is just the beginning of their nightmare." And, trying not to give too much about this review away before you've even started reading it, it was worth those few quid...
Aftershock is an average but clever film - by that, I mean it starts as any other disaster movie, big party, everyone having fun and then mother nature strikes bad. An earthquake strikes and it's like a certificate 18 version of 2012. There are limbs everywhere, people being splattered, blood filling the place - it's an Eli Roth film, what would you expect?
If it wasn't gory and over the top with the blood, I would have been pretty damn upset, being that I watch Eli Roth films for the gore... I mean, who doesn't?!
This film has gore though, you will not be upset by any lack here, I certainly was not that's for sure...
The start of the film is the earthquake, which is as much entertaining as earthquakes can be, but the rest of the film is the horror the rest of the world can hold, mainly what other humans can do to each other. The second part of the film shows just how much people will do to survive, and how far people could go without rules, and it's scary.
I guess I would consider it scarier than mother nature in some ways, people in this are burned alive, they are shot, just killed in ways all done by humans and none by mother nature. It's a bit like when I first saw the remake of War of The Worlds, loved it but damn, it worried it. My bum cheeks were clenched the whole damn time through that film, it just seemed so realistic and makes you think. Like this might happen if there was some sort of disaster like this. Aftershock isn't as scary, (then again, I was a fair bit younger when I saw War of The Worlds...), but it still pulls a few punches and makes you doubt the people around you...
Aftershock isn't awful, it came out a few years ago and is very unheard of, but it is entertaining and would definitely covered an hour and a half... An hour and a half you wouldn't mind losing to this film.
It's not Mr Roth's best film, but it works and it's different and I do plan to watch it again soon, so that's good! Do it if you want something entertaining with some gore - you probably won't regret it.
I get excited a lot, I know this, but for this film, I was so so stoked - I had heard that it was seriously scary. "Every 30 years, a lonely old house in the fields of New England wakes up and demands a sacrifice."
We are Still Here looks like one of those movies that isn't going to be that good, it's filmed, without sounding too harsh, like a cheap movie to start with. Like one of those low budget ones you get late on the Horror channel that you pretty much know has a 50/50 chance of being one of the worst things ever, or one of the most underrated things ever. This started out as one of those films, but I had heard really good things, and I had seen articles about how scary it was.. so I guess I was kind of expecting a lot...
It starts off as a normal horror film, all happy with the couple leaving in a lovely house in the middle of nowhere, well, that happiness stops for the audience once the creepy 'neighbours' drop in. And I say 'neighbours' lightly, as it must take a good drive to even reach one of the houses in this film, they are so damn far from each other. It wouldn't be like popping next door as you would, this would be like walking a marathon to walk to your neighbours. The neighbours are weird though, I feel you would be relieved that they are so far away...
They pop over and pop in for some whiskey, (seems to be the only drink the Sacchetti's actually own.), but then they start acting weird, too much is said by the husband and the wife says bugger all, until she leaves them a note pretty much saying for them to leave. But do they heed to their new neighbours warnings? Do they heck! They stay, of course they do, why would they leave?!
Know the funny things about horror films, none of the characters in the film ever seem to heed warnings, or act like they have never really seen a horror film before - obviously ignoring Scream... Us viewers are sitting there watching literally about to leave our own house in case of ghosts, and the characters in the film don't even consider leaving. In fact, in We are Still Here the characters even invite their friends up to stay, and then don't get worried when some of them go missing and don't turn up... This is also set when no one had mobile phones so there was no way of really asking someone where they were - that makes it sound even more scary if someone doesn't turn up, you can't even call and ask. But yet, the son and his girlfriend don't turn up and no one really bats an eyelid. This is after they learn the houses angry little secret too, and after strange things have been happening, anddddddddd even when the friends turn out to be medium type people...
One thing I loved about this film was the spirits, they are genuinely creepy as hell, and the twist all about the house is one I did not see coming. It's not the most original but it still makes for a nice little ending. The gore and make up too? Bravo. Brilliant. This film is worth some of the hype it got, some, not all of it as I have seen better, but I would definitely recommend people watching it if they wanted a good haunting movie about angry ghosts...
Yet another Netflix original, "Two estranged sisters are forced to rob a bank in order to save their brother. But this is no ordinary bank." - but one that really isn't all that bad.
Netflix originals make me feel like I am actually up to date with films without having to leave the house - they make me feel good. And The Vault wasn't too bad, the only thing with it, and the reason I didn't jump to write a review on it, was because I feel it only really has elements on horror. feel it's more of a thriller but the elements of horror are good, and do fill a fair bit of the film - that is why I allowed it here.
The Vault starts out as a normal robbery film, robbers pick on a bank, take hostages, try to get the money - but this one is different. This one starts with James Franco's character at work, and an interview going on, before the robbers plan sets in.
Again, this is just not any bank...
Turns out, below the bank, the old bank with all the money in, is haunted. I don't mind bank movies like this at all, but when it includes some type of horror element, I am in, and especially with bad people and angry ghosts... That is one way I know karma will be served. Even though the robbers feel they have a good reason to rob a bank, (I am not sure there is a good reason to rob a bank..), you are still behind karma and karma biting them right in the arse. And that is where the ghosts and spirits come into it...
Yes, if you like movies about ghosts spreading karma, this movie could be for you. And the ghosts are pretty creepy. I did really like the ghosts actually, they were damn creepy, and had a good and original story behind them.
The way they killed people too, I loved it, ghosts with a love for gore are my favourites, if you wouldn't have already guessed..
The Vault is an okay movie, I liked the ghosts and the below the bank side of it, but the film as a whole was kind of slow moving - it's still fairly entertaining though, and one I wouldn't say to people not to watch. I just wouldn't shout to see it from the roof top...
One thing I did like though, and this would be insanely obviously to some, it had a good twist, one that I really did not see coming - dad spotted some of it, but even he was impressed by the ending. The twist didn't make it an amazing film, but it's still fairly entertaining overall.
Watching horror films since like 2003, when I could stand dead bodies..