BEWARE THE MOON REVIEWS
Okay, now before I get into anything, Cold Skin came up under the horror section of Netflix - it has a few elements of horror, but I would say it's more an adventure, maybe sci fi. I love reviewing though, so I am going to review it anyway... "In 1914, a young man arrives at a remote island near the Antarctic Circle to take the post of weather observer only to find himself trapped in a watchtower besieged by deadly creatures which live in hiding on the island." (I blame my date for this lack of horror review - he chose it.).
I have no idea where to start with this film if I am honest, I feel very mellow about it. And very dirty after it, mainly with one concept, one which I will get to later on... It's too early to talk about it now.
I didn't really think much of this film to be fair, I had a lot of questions, and I just wasn't really blown away by Cold Skin.
The only thing I really liked about Cold Skin, if I am honest, were the creatures, the 'Toads' as they called them. Gruner, the man in the lighthouse, kept one as company, and she was very cat like, and obviously, having a fur baby myself, I warmed to her. I warmed to them all, even when they were a bit crazy and trying to kill the Gruner and Friend, they just looked nice. How they are made up was also very well done, I have to say, very realistic and thought out. Apart from when they turned CGI, not so impressed there... But I still liked them the most out of this entire film, I felt for them, in my eyes, they were just animals with people invading their territory. And how can you hate animals?!
Back to the part I wouldn't talk about earlier, brace yourself. Turns out, Gruner is having sex with his companion... His cat like, animal like, non English speaking companion. This not only made me and my date feel insanely weird and kind of dirty, but I had a lot of questions, starting with first: HOW!? How did he even make it happen, she doesn't understand any form of human conversation, did he just tell her to lie still?! It brought up questions that I was thinking about, but then I decided I didn't want to, because it put images I didn't want in my head - but I couldn't help it. Just one of those things I could have done without, it definitely pulled me back into the film though and woke me up, just because it was so DAMN WEIRD.
Overall, I was not really a fan of Cold Skin. I don't really feel it was under the right category to start with, and I just wasn't into it as a whole. I loved the creatures though, and the make up on them, but apart from that, I wasn't living for this.
I definitely have a bone to pick with whoever gave this film to Netflix - US OVER HERE IN THE UK HAVE NEVER GOTTEN IT. It's an English cast, yet, it never seemed to reach over here, and that made me sad. I had heard some good things and I have waited about two years for this. I ended up turning to my best friend CEX and buying it from there instead... "Reuniting after the tragic death of their friend, four college pals set out to hike through the Scandinavian wilderness. A wrong turn leads them into the mysterious forests of Norse legend, where an ancient evil exists and stalks them at every turn."
I tell you what, this movie is great at pulling you in to start with, Rob's death is harsh as hell! It's a massive punch in the face. And that's not a spoiler by the way, before anyone gets worried. It's a very dark death to say the least. I watched part of this with my parents and neither knew he was going to die, unlike me, but it was still as shocking knowing it was coming. I feel that makes a very good opening to a film.
We then skip ahead and the group of friends have gone on the holiday Rob wanted, and most of them aren't loving life, let's say the least. One thing I really didn't like about this film, was how 'laddish' the guys all tried to act. It was all "mate" this and "mate" that, and it just didn't match many of the characters. I could never expect Rafe Spall to say mate that much or even Sam Troughton, but then again, I do just think of him as Much out of Robin Hood... I just felt it was pushed, for all of them. It's a bit like if someone as nice as David Suchet, was in a film with Danny Dyer, but he did all the swearing instead of Mr Dyer. It just doesn't really feel that natural...
Don't get me wrong, I did like this film, but I do feel it slowed down the further it got into the film. I was really into it at the start, and when they found the cottage, it was very tense in my living room, but by the end, I wasn't that happy. The ending was not a good one. It just felt like they ran out of ideas, action and more action, right up until the last scene and it just ends. Nahhhhh. It didn't ruin it, but it definitely could have been better.
Overal, I am glad I watched The Ritual, but the ending could have been so much better, and I did feel it lost it's spark in places, but I still enjoyed it. Luckily the ending did not kill the mood.
I have just learnt something new by having to Google how you spelt the title of this film, and I now know what it means, and it is very clever - having or showing a wish to do evil to others. Cleverrrrr. "A brother-sister team that fabricates paranormal encounters for cash gets more than it bargains for when it takes a job in an estate with real paranormal activity." Hey, wanna watch a film that should really be called "What happens when karma bites you in the butt"? Here it is.
I had heard such bad things about this film, luckily, I didn't listen to any of them, fancied it and watched it, and I actually really loved it. Again, there is a bit of a twist, which is kind of obvious as I feel it has been done a good few times before, but it fitted in really well, like a little puzzle piece. I didn't really see it coming as I don't try and work out endings, but I had a tiny bit of an idea that something like it might be coming - still enjoyed it lots and lots though. I watched this film while doing cardio at the gym, and I know I liked it as I kept looking forward to getting on those machines at the gym, (I hate cardio...), and watching more of the film.
Malevolent has a lovely feel to it too. It's set in the 80s in Scotland and the colour of the film is just a warming glow, I also liked all the characters, none of them got on my nerves really, I did care what happened to them, but I was also torn as karma... What the characters do in the film literally goes against every bone in my body and what I believe. I believe that if spirits want to contact you, they will, they don't need someone to talk for them. And I also don't believe people should charge to "speak" to spirits or to rid them out of where ever they are haunting. Don't be a dick, help people. Ask for petrol and food and maybe a bed if you have to, but don't charge people an arm and a leg - especially if it's fake. The characters in this literally do the opposite of that, and of course, it comes back and bites them.
Was I shocked? Only at the twist in some ways? Was I worried for the characters? YES. And if you watch it, you'll know why, they didn't deserve it all at the end, just a little warning would have worked, I'm sure - especially from them.
Overall, I really enjoyed this film. It's got a fairly obvious storyline and a kind of obvious twist, but it's still highly enjoyable, very much so. If anyone fancied a ghost hunting film that goes wrong and isn't found footage or part of a show, highly recommend Malevolent - just don't try and work out the twist, might ruin it for you.
And don't trick people like in it, 'cause karma.
Me and this Oculus have a bit of a strange story, in the way that months ago I actually found the whole film on Youtube and started watching it but never got around to finishing it. I have to say, it was not as good as I had remembered it was... "A woman tries to exonerate her brother, who was convicted of murder, by proving that the crime was committed by a supernatural phenomenon."
Oculus is an alright film, that’s about it. It’s about a cursed mirror and the best parts of the film are the creatures that are to do with the mirror, full stop. The rest of it is pretty mediocre. I loved the creatures though, they are genuinely creepy AF, and are done to perfection. They are simple and are not trying too hard, and it works so well. They are just humans with darker features, lit up eyes and weird scary teeth, and my gosh, I would cross the road if I saw them coming towards me. I loved them, but that’s about the only thing I did love...
Oculus’ storyline is nothing really new, and what happens in the film isn’t really new, and that’s the main problem here. Nothing really is ever new, and everything is borrowed in some ways nowadays, but you can mix things up, and I think that is what is missing here. The monsters are different, but the whole cursed object fighting against siblings whose parents had something to do with it thing, just is done a lot, and I just could not get into it. The monster, yes, I was into them, but as soon as they weren’t on the TV, I was wishing I was watching another Mike Flannigan production... Sorry, the monsters really gave me the creeps though... I didn’t hate it, I just couldn’t really get into it...
No one judge me for watching a Christmas movie in February, I don’t do it, I just had an evening on my own and I had bought it a few weeks ago and fancied it. Good god – I am glad I did! "On a quiet suburban street, a babysitter must defend a twelve-year-old boy from intruders, only to discover it's far from a normal home invasion."
This film is a beautiful little horror film. Sadly, I cannot say much about it at all as there is a massive twist that no one sees coming and I am not going to be one of those people who ruins it. Especially as people around this film were also very smart and didn't give anything away. By that, I am mainly pointing a finger towards the people who make movie trailers, but can’t help but give too much away – looking at the Triangle trailer now... You evil beast. You are very safe with the Better Watch Out trailer, it does not give anything away at all, nothing – bravo, I love watching horror movie trailers, but it’s always a risk. The trailer gives nothing away and like everything else, leads you down the wrong path.
I am so worried to give anything away, so this looks to be one of my shortest reviews of my life. I feel all I should say about this film, is it is great. I was so happy watching this film, like so damn happy. It just made me happy. I didn't see the twists coming, it had blood, it had likable and really hateable characters to it, and I just had a whale of a time watching this. I watched three over the weekend, and this was, hands down, the best one of the lot. It’s just a great film, and a great twist, and a great ending. Oh boy, the ending, but again like most of the rest, I can’t mention it! Just make sure you watch after the credits, and when you finish it, cheer for the use of the song before the credits. Now you must go and watch Better Watch Out – GO.
Oh boyyyyyyy, I had heard a lot about this film, and it pops up on a lot of lists I read. (My pastime is reading lists on horror films I should see, gets me very excited.). So, picture the scene, popped into my fave CEX one day, and there it was, sitting there, so I nabbed it, and am I glad I did? I would say so, yes. "A mother of two who inherits a house is confronted with murderous intruders on the first night in their new home and fights for her daughters' lives. Sixteen years later when the daughters reunite at the house, things get really strange."
I have to say, I am in the middle with this one. I had heard such great things about it, and it was a great film, and some moments are truly weird, but I was not blown away by it. It wasn't like Better Watch Out when I told everyone about it and just wanted someone to discuss it with. Wait, that's a lie - I would love someone to discuss this film with! I had to Google and YouTube it just to make sure I was right with what I thought the twist was. I was right, I think I missed out a full details, but I got the main idea of it.
The twist in Incident in a Ghostland kind makes the film to be fair. Before it's just a normal intruder film with the main character just surviving and getting on with life, normally by writing about it, as in this film, which is not awful, it just is nothing new I guess. The twist though, that I did not see coming at all, turns that whole thing on its head and it becomes a pretty dim film with some dirty, dirttyyyyyyy moments. Incident turns into a very bleak film, obviously, I am not going to say why, as no spoilers allowed here, but it is very clever and original in the way that it is literally split into two. The first part is one story, whereas the second part is a whole different ball game, one that genuinely made me pull that "I've just smelt something bad" bad. It's grim and naaaaasty. It's just a bit of a grimy film, and the characters are all a bit grim too, they are people you would not want to be friends with... Let's say that, nasty nasty people.
Incident in a Ghsotland is a film that I don't know where it sits with me. I enjoyed it, and I liked the twist, and I couldn't really picked out any parts of it I really hated, (apart from the sisters constant screaming...it runs through me like nails on a chalk board.), but it didn't get me excited, I don't feel I want to watch it again. I don't know whether that is because it is a bit grim or whether I just couldn't fully get into it. Maybe I'll re watch it at some point and I'll love it. Who knows. It's a good film but I just don't feel blown away...
Oh, and lots of ugly crying in this film. L-O-T-S.
Like a fair few other films I have watched, I had heard some things already about this film. Before watching it, it had always felt like one of those films that a lot of people had heard of, but only a small amount had actually watched. I finally got round to watching it, and actually, I was not disappointed. "In a world of vampires, an expert vampire hunter and his young protégé travel toward sanctuary."
I liked Stake Land, I really did, I felt it was a very original type of vampire film. It's set during a form of the apocalypse, such as the Walking Dead does, but Stake Land has more vampires and most of the time, more action. Sorry, Walking Dead, but you have lost some of your action during the past few series though...
Stake Land follows Mister and Martin, while they do their bit saving the rest of humanity from crazy-ass vampires - great vampires though. They roar and shriek, they have black eyes and are covered in blood but still look human. So damn good. Bravo and props to the props and SFX crew! You all deserve to get seen on TV collecting your well deserved Oscars, just saying - I GOT YOU.
Stake Land is a fairly quick paced film, but is about the actual human characters and not just the vampires, so it does slow down sometimes. They don't last long though, take them as nice little breathers and for character development, never a bad thing. I guess I just like the action and horror parts to a horror and not so much the slow parts... I liked the slowed down parts, I liked learning about the characters and I know it's more realistic as life is not all about the fast lane - quote me on a fridge magnet for that. Just me being selfish and wanting more horror...
I have to say, Mister was my favourite characters, I loved him. He just had that whole mysterious, cool guy thing going for him. (His name is actually Mister in this. That wasn't me trying to be kinky...). Martin though, I just could not warm to him, I don't really know why, he wasn't that whiny and he could just about take care of himself, but he just wasn't my cup of tea.
Overall, Stake Land is a good film. It's a breath of fresh air for vampire and apocalypse films, and shows they don't always have to be slow and dull. I shall be watching the second one soon, no doubt.
Oh, and it made me jump while on the cross fit machine at the gym. Bravo.
Ooooooh, look at me go, another new film that I actually watched less than a month after it was released! I am proud! "After paintings by an unknown artist are discovered, a supernatural force enacts revenge on those who have allowed their greed to get in the way of art."
I had heard mixed reviews about Velvet Buzzsaw, I don't like to read reviews before watching a film, but I saw headlines, and most did not hype it up after seeing it. Before it came out, everyone was excited, after, I didn't see a lot of good stuff. But lesson for you, don't listen to reviews, take them as an opinion, but have your own. I listen to all those headlines, but loved the storyline, and so watched it anyway - and I am so freakin' glad I did! I loved this film, like loved it. It's just so damn different and interesting! It's really reminded me of the painting in Ghostbusters 2... but to be fair, I am not sure which painting I would rather look at...
Be warned, this film is a tad weird and has some very over the top 'arty' characters, but it works so well. I did art for a good few years at school and sixth form, (I was useless...), and this film literally feels like how art is, and how art galleries are. Such as anything can be art, no matter how bad it is or how weird it is. And how OTT people into art can be sometimes, or rather the stereotype of what people in the arts are like. It's very very good in that way, all the characters are OTT and really play to that stereotype and I loved every moment of it.
Another thing I love about this film, (let's be fair, I love it all..), was the deaths. Obviously, I am not going to say who dies or when or anything, but I will say, each death is great. They are so different and it's death by art, literally by paintings, and maybe one robot...maybe. I didn't see any of the deaths coming, mainly, because I have never really seen paintings kill - it's new to me! Ghostbusters 2 was the one hint that I had of art killing people that I have seen as far as I know... But obviously less gory and more PG. This is very much less PG and more Jake Gyllenhaal in Brokeback Mountain.
One thing though, I am getting glasses next week, due to not being able to see far off, and I have learnt from this about glasses, and in this film Jake Gyllenhaal is taking his glasses on and off like there is no tomorrow. It is like he doesn't know if he is really blind or short or long - make up your mind! Unless he is wearing them as part of his outfit... who knows. I might never know.
I loved Velvet Buzzsaw, like honestly adored it. I had the time of my life watching this. Watched it with dad and he also liked it, and the sad thing was we had to stop it with about 50 minutes left, and had to finish it off two days later... those two days were haaaaard. I wanted to finish it, but also not as I was enjoying it so damn much. I was so torn with my feelings.
I would highly recommend this film, highly, already have and I only finished it a few days ago... Great cast too, a shockinly solid cast with the likes of one of my faves Jake Gyllenhaal, (spelt that all by myself..), Toni Collette and Zawe Ashton, who I am so happy is doing big things - it's just a solid film.
Please, if you do one thing this weekend or whenever you have a free few hours, watch this film - you will not regret it! DO IT.
I was into this from the start, even before I had started watching it, I was into it. From the start even before I had started watching it I was into the storyline. "Majestic mountains, a still lake and venomous betrayals engulf a female married couple attempting to celebrate their one-year anniversary."
What Keeps You Alive is a sneaky little film, and it's also sneaky as I don't really know what to say about it without giving any spoilers away... This could genuinely be the shortest review I have ever done.
It is a sneaky film due to one scene that is literally a punch in the face, but so hard that your jaw falls to the floor. See what I did there, jaw dropping to the floor and so... I watched this doing cardio and during this scene, I threw my arms off the machine and think I nearly hit the floor and almost died, but it was so worth it. I needed this scene, this film needed this scene. Before this scene, it was just a thriller in a cabin by the lake, nothing special, this scene started it up, it changed the whole mood. I loved it so damn much! Cardio went so damn quickly as I was so into this film after that.
I liked pretty much everything about this film, the characters are great, and actually aren't too thick for once, it's pretty bloody and the best thing, it's pro LGBT - and we need more of that in the world. Anything that is pro LGBT, I am in!
I am going to stop this review here as I don't want to give anything away, and the big twist comes right near the beginning. All I am going to say is see this film - I loved it and I hope you will too!
More like a TED talk than a review this one, it's so damn short.
I was very very excited for The Strangers: Prey At Night, I actually did like the first The Strangers but I did feel it lacked something, and I hoped Prey at Night could give me what I wanted in the first one and what I felt was missing. "A family of four staying at a secluded mobile home park for the night are stalked and then hunted by three masked psychopaths."
I have to say, I am torn with which Strangers film I prefer, I know I shouldn't pin them against each other, but I feel I should in this case... And I feel it is a little equal and fair with these two, I actually think I preferred the story in the first one, but felt the second one took advantage of the story and the horror aspects more - also, the second one has a kick-ass soundtrack. Literally, one of the best soundtracks in a film, and you know I love songs that are in horror films but that shouldn't fit in horror films but do... If that makes sense at all... Prey at Night had Tiffany in it, and I literally know all the words to that song, so...
I would definitely say Prey at Night is more action packed, and more happens in this one, it's less of a slow burner and more of one to keep you on the edge of your seat. You know what you're in for in this film, due to the first one, and it takes advantage of that. This one follows the same type of story, except I felt this one embraced the gore and jump scares more - and I liked it. This one used more action where as the first one relied on psychological side of it.
Normally I would side more with the psychological horrors as I do tend to like them over jump scares, but the second one just kept me watching more - I didn't think much of the first to be fair.
Prey at Night is better than the first for sure, but I think I still wanted more. It's such a scary concept, and it didn't scare me, it made me jump a few times, and I was into it, but I wasn't having to go around and check all the doors were locked - let's say that. I find the idea scary, of people targeting you for no reason and literally chasing you until they basically have your heart in their hands - and that isn't some corny Bebo love quote... But again, like the first, I don't think they took full advantage of it - it was creepy at some points but I wanted it to be a white knuckle ride.
I liked Strangers: Prey at Night, and it kept me entertained and I did actually jump, but I wanted more. I feel I can't it against it as I have never watched a film that has ever really scared me apart from cheap jump scares, so it won't lose points for that. I enjoyed it, I'll leave it at that. All I ask, is for maybe a another one, but this one being more creepy and psychological, too much to ask?
Watching horror films since like 2003, when I could stand dead bodies..