BEWARE THE MOON REVIEWS
Finallyyyyyyyyyyy, The Cottage was on TV! 'In a remote part of the countryside, a bungled kidnapping turns into a living nightmare for four central characters when they cross paths with a psychopathic farmer and all hell breaks loose.' I have wanted to see this film for ages, probably years, and it just has never been...until now. I SAW IT. And, I have to say, it was worth it..
It was worth it, wasn't the best film, like it wasn't like when I first saw Stitches and watched it twice in one week, but it was still worth it. I mainly was excited by the cast, the cast that consisted of Reece Shearsmith and Andy Serkis as the leads - I love both of those men. Especially Reece Shearsmith, Inside No 9 is one of the most underrated TV shows that has ever hit the TV, it's just genius. But back to The Cottage...
As mentioned before, I have wanted to see this film for years, why this one film, I have no idea, something about it just made me want to watch it lots. I am glad I saw it, but I think I could have waited for a bit longer to have seen it and I wouldn't of been that sad. I don't mean that in a bad way at all, I just mean it was nothing special compared to other horror films...
The Cottage is an entertaining film, its got gore, its got violence, its got a scary killer and its got the victims. It's an all round entertaining horror film, which is not at all a bad thing, but it just doesn't stand out compared to other films like it. It doesn't really have anything original about it - it has got some wit, and some good gore though, I'll give it that. The gore is pretty damn good actually, I didn't really finish this film wanting more blood, because the kills were very good, but that is probably the best thing about it. The cast and the gore that is. And the fact that when I watched this, we had just set up our new, bigger 4K TV... Hello, crystal clear blood and guts...
The Cottage is an alright film, as I've said before, it's entertaining, but it did nearly change that for me, I nearly was very impressed by it.. Now, one thing you may or may not know about me is that I love a good ending. If a film has been awful, a brilliant ending might actually change thoughts on that awful film for me. The Cottage had a good ending. Spoilers here until the next paragraph. Peter is the only survivor, and after 'killing' the Farmer, he makes it into the safety of the basement..or so he thinks. Turns out, the Farmers' crazy wife and kids live down there, and they want Peter for dinner. I thought this was brilliant, I did not expect it at all, and the fact that it wasn't a happy ending but still had a bit of humour to it - YES PLEASE. Anddddddd, then the credits roll, and low and behold, there is another ending. Will this be better and carry on to the last ending? Will it heck. It ruins the ending. The other bad guys arrive and the Farmer jumps out of nowhere, (good try, Peter with the killing him there...), and the screen goes black.
I hate most endings like this, especially following a pretty clever ending. Damn you wanting to follow the big budget films and all there 'after the credits' endings. No!
The Cottage is okay, you can watch it and you won't feel you've wasted hours you'll never get back, but you won't go around shouting from the roof that you've seen it. It has a good, pretty original storyline, and is entertaining - and there is nothing wrong with that. Nothing wrong with watching this film as long as you're not expecting a masterpiece.
Watching horror films since like 2003, when I could stand dead bodies..