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puts you off...

Old People

4/1/2017

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Love them or hate them, old people are always around and will always be around, but have you ever thought about them in depth, mainly how they are in horror films? No? Nah, me neither, until nowwwwww. And it turns out, they are pretty damn scary...

Oh, and there will be spoilers.
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I am starting with a very obivious one here... Obvious if you know the film but it is a pretty recent film, The Visit. The Visit is about some grandkids who go and visit their grandparents, ones who they have never met, might I add, and one's who the mum didn't really see before sending the kids to them.  I find this family weird from the start, the boy annoys me with all his awful rapping, the girl annoys me because she's just so nice, and the grandparents are just weird - obviously.
And the grandparents being weird all becomes clear at the end, they are not who they say they are, and they turn into old people I would not like to cross on a dark night. I would like to think I could hold my own against people, especially older people, but maybe not when they are not human like these two... I'll stay well clear, thank you.

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You know how I mentioned above that I wouldn't cross those old people, yeahhh, I wouldn't cross this one either, Mrs Ganush from Drag Me to Hell. Dear God, man, why did Christine not just give her more time?! 'A loan officer who evicts an old woman from her home finds herself the recipient of a supernatural curse. Desperate, she turns to a seer to try and save her soul, while evil forces work to push her to a breaking point.' The woman literally tormented her and literally dragged her to hell, like, why didn't you giver her more time to get the money?!
Normally, this woman would annoy me, as I don't like special treatment on some, but if she is able to torment someone with a hanky, they can have all the time in the world. Please don't hurt me...

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Legion is a good film, I feel it's actually quite underrated to be fair - 'When a group of strangers at a dusty roadside diner come under attack by demonic forces, their only chance for survival lies with an archangel named Michael, who informs a pregnant waitress that her unborn child is humanity's last hope.' There are a few parts of this film that stuck in my head more than others though, one of them being the old lady and her big mouth. Yep, old lady and her big mouth.
This little old lady comes into the dinner, sits down, orders a pretty raw steak, before taunting and swearing at the rest, mainly about how the waitresses baby will burn in hell.. as you do. She then tries to rip someones throat out and just basically goes mad... and crawls along the ceiling like a spider... Yeah, we'll leave her be.

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One that I am mentioning on here, that I have to own up to not actually seeing, is Rabid Grannies. 'When given a demonic present by their black sheep nephew two kindly old grannies are transformed into demons who proceed to gorily knock-off their greedy relatives.' I have nothing to really say about this, as, as I said, I have not seen it, but I feel I need to.
Even though I have never seen it, I am putting it on the list, for the main reason, that rabid grannies do not sound nice. Rabids are bad enough, let alone from a human.

I hate lists, because I am sure I am going to miss really good ones out, but this is the list of old people. I am stopping it here or else it will be like a novel...
And on that note, I shall cross the road at any of these old people and go and find my mums boxsets of The Golden Girls to watch...
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